The SAT is to Ronnie Paulino as….

SAT Review

In our first section we will review analogies.

1.  Dietary Pills are to Amphetamines as Weight Gainers are to _______________.

    A.  Steroids

    B.  Something that makes your skull grow

    C.  Jaguar Testosterone

    D.  HGH

    E.  All of the Above

    2.  Prepared Statements from Your Agent is to Genuine as Ronnie Paulino is to _________________.

    A.  Sorry

    B.  Fake

    C.  Sham

    D.  Inauthentic

    E.  All of the Above

    Read the following passage and answer the next questions either True or False.

    ”I accept full responsibility and all consequences for this mistake, and therefore choose not to challenge my suspension,” the 29-year-old Paulino said. ”I was irresponsible for failing to take all precautionary steps in confirming the approval of the dietary pill. Without a doubt, I have learned from my mistake.”

    1.  Ronnie Paulino uses the word precautionary all the time.

    A.  True

    B.  False

    2.  Ronnie Paulino is a catcher who plays half his games in Miami where the average temperature is 95 degrees and humid, but still requires a dietary pill.

    A.  True

    B.  False

    In this final section, please write what you would say if you were caught the second time with a PED (Dietary Pill).

    I am calling you here today because I messed up.  I tried to cheat the rules and I was caught.  The drug I used was an amphetamine and I use it to wake me up.  I know that it is illegal and my career could be over.  I was stupid.  As you know we only get 50 game suspensions for doing something the second time.  I was weak and chose to go the easy route.  I am ashamed of myself and ask that you forgive me for making such a stupid decision.  The suspension isn’t a wake up call.  It is a time for me to take a long look in the mirror and figure out what the root of this problem is all about.


    I don’t think Ronnie is a bad guy at all.  Ever time I have said hi to him at the plate he has greeted me with a smile.  But it frustrates me so much when guys continue to make these types of decisions when they know full well that it is wrong.  Not only that, the players know that the tests are random and can happen anytime.  Come on!  Unless you have a serious addiction, this is simply a slap in the face of integrity.

    My hope is that this doesn’t end Ronnie’s playing career.

    16 Comments on “The SAT is to Ronnie Paulino as….”

    1. gayle says:

      Here is what I dont understand about this. Does he think fans are stupid? He has to right? What baseball player these days doesn’t go to the team, the trainer, the UNION before he takes some “dietary supplement” and check thatit is ok and nothing on it is on the banned list?

      I tell you a player who wants to wilfully cheat. If he needed something to lose weight why not go to the trainers and see if there was anything supplement wise that was safe to take and do that. Why not go on a freaking diet?

      Maybe 3 years ago this excuse would have held up but not now.

    2. mb21 says:

      My only question is this: why does Paulino have to apologize to me (a fan)? I could understand that he needs to apologize to his wife and kids if he has them, his teammates perhaps and maybe even the organization (executives), but he owes me no apology. So why even give one to me? I don’t deserve one and he doesn’t owe me one. He never hurt me in any way whatsoever.

      These apologies are all crap because they’re not really apologies. For an apology to be sincere, it must be deserved and we don’t deserve that. He owes that to those he hurt and we’re not among that group. Athletes should stop giving apologies to people who don’t deserve them. Then this whole thing goes away about whether or not he was sincere. None of them are. They can’t be. You can’t be sincerely sorry to someone that is meaningless to you. Paulino and the others may as well apologize people in Germany too. They’re as deserving of that same apology as we are.

      • Well mb21 I have to think about this one. I think the apology is made to address a wrong. Although he may not be apologizing to you, he has put his family, teammates, and the Marlins in a bad light. What I was really trying to show was legitimate humbleness and understanding that Paulino knowingly deceived the game of baseball.


    3. floyd says:

      Why should Paulino apologize?

      Why did the CEO of BP have to apologize for the oil spill?

      Why must a company who makes a mistake publically apologize to its customers?

      The fact is that anyone who buys a ticket to a sporting event is a customer of that sport. It doesn’t matter if you watch that them, you are a customer of that sport, baseball, football, soccer….etc.

      Paulino like BP, the tainted eggs from this past week, disgraced baseball, and he cheated the rules, and cheated the fans.

      Major league baseball like the NFL, NBA, is a multi-million dollar sport, customers are the reason the sport exist and the reason the players have a job.

      So as a paying customer, I bought a ticket to a game which was fixed, a game where someone cheated, I deserve an apology. I deserve full disclosure.

      I don’t believe that the majority of players caught using PED are sorry, really remorsefull, I believe that there needs to be a crackdown, true punishment, such as suspension for a year, removing all records set by offenders, because until the punishment fits the crime, better yet the punishment is a deterent, players will continue to use PED’s.

      The punishment for PED’s must act a real deterent before players will stop using them.

    4. Ed Cardenas says:

      I don’t know. The old saying is that if your not cheating, your not trying. But at the same time, why risk your career if it’s not necessary? Major league baseball is so competitive with every year there are 7 or so minor league affiliates for every team chock full of players ready to take your spot on the major league roster.

      The temptation to take a supplement that might extend your career or make it easier to hit a ball is tremendous! I would be curious how many players would fail that test if when they walk in the club house tomorrow they were ALL ordered to take that test. 20%? 30%? More?

      • I don’t know how many players would fail, but the problem is deeper than a baseball decision. My problem with the Paulino story is that he said he is using something to control his weight. I don’t believe that at all. Yet he says in his statement that he has learned his lesson. You have to tell the honest truth before you understand your lesson.


    5. lisa gray says:

      i have a hard time gasping in horror over this PED stuff, i really do. especially over the counter supplements. REALLY especially over weak versions of the greenies that Our Heeeroes who were so pure and squeaky clean BITGOD who wouldn’t nevah EVAH have taken nothin but wheaties – used to take by the handfuls.

      i know that some ingredients which sound ok – like flower oil – actually break down into something that turns up on the nono list. and there is absolutely no evidence that a lot of these compounds actually DO enhance the performance of any young male athlete.

      but not checking anything that you eat or drink with the team trainer/doctor is just dumb, especially THESE days.

      and if you don’t think that losing 1/3 of your yearly salary is any sort of “real deterrent”, you MUST be kidding. the guys may not be remorseful about using in the first place, and i don’t care if they pretend to be or not – i’m tired of all this fake apology stuff – but they are DEFINITELY remorseful about losing all that money. how many guys do you see getting caught?

      as for “the Records” – well, i do not want to start removing any numbers. you can’t erase all of one hitter’s stats without affecting the pitching stats, the fielding stats, and, in fact, the outcomes of games. and this is whether or not it could even ever be proved that any substance taken had an actual effect on performance at all.

      for example – i’m tired of seeing HGH referred to as a “performance enhancing drug” when there is no proof of ANY kind WHATSOEVER that this particular chemical has any effect on a young healthy male athlete. and the idea that asthma medication enhances performance of any person without asthma is too absurd for words…

      • Lisa I agree with your view. I don’t really understand the what HGH is exactly. All I know is that it is banned so you can’t use it. The amphetemines “diet pills” that are used are to keep guys awake and give them focus.

        What I don’t like is that they tell you what you can take and what you can’t. They give you a giant list of supplements that have been cleared for use. Whenever I see someone fail the test I just can’t understand how this can happen.

        As for records….I don’t know what to do there, but I don’t like that cheaters are given credit for milestones that they couldn’t do naturally.


    6. Tim #11 says:

      A Joe Posnanski blog entry brought to my attention a paper written by someone who had done research into the spike in power numbers during the steroid era. He questions the idea that steroids play as big a role as everyone assumes in the inflation of the numbers. Before we assume that all of the milestones are due to steroids we might want to take a good look at what this guy has to say. I was skeptical before I read the article, but now I think what he says could be possible.

      That said, completely against the use of steroids just as much as anyone else. I think that the players who did use them should apologize. I am in favor of the increased testing and the penalties for those who are caught.

      However, I think that the records should stand. Whether the article is right about the (non) effect of steroids on power numbers, then changing them would be unfair to those who had achieved them. Even if the paper isn’t right, I still don;t think we can change the records. We have no way of knowing who used steroids and who didn’t. We would be taking down the numbers of some players, and leaving the numbers of others who cheated just because we didn’t catch them. Also, the numbers were set while competing against other players who were also “juiced.” It is impossible to know what numbers were effected and to what degree.

      This is a link to the Joe Posnanski blog entry, and he links to the paper in the blog.

      Read the paper and think about it before you dismiss the idea.

      Another issue is the Hall of Fame.
      Should steroid users get in?
      Are their numbers hugely inflated due to their steroid use?
      Even if steroid use was not effective in inflating numbers, should we put people in the Hall who TRIED to cheat even if it didn’t work?
      What about the players who will certainly get in who used steroids without getting caught?
      What about the players who were clean but who’s numbers (may have) suffered as a result of the cheaters all around them?

      Morgan, I’d be really interested to hear your take as a player on the paper and the ideas it puts out. Is it plausible? Does home run power really come mostly from the lower-body? Is the whole idea a load of crap?


      • Here you go Tim!

        1. Steroid users shouldn’t get in to the Hall of Fame.
        2. I don’t know how much their numbers are inflated, but they are inflated in my opinion.
        3. Cheaters shouldn’t be in the Hall of Fame period. I don’t care what they are taking. This is about integrity.
        4. If a player gets in who isn’t caught then they got in as a cheater. There is no honor in that.
        5. Players who are clean have to compete no matter what the circumstances. What is cool is that those clean players showed themselves that they could make it in the Big Leagues and I think that is cool.
        6. I think power comes from the legs. If you look at most players, we are lower-half strong. But hips and abs are imortant in the transfer. But that is just an opinion.

        Good Stuff Tim!


    7. lisa gray says:


      as best i understand it, (talking ONLY about 20-30 year old healthy MALE althletes) HGH is used by weightlifters who are also using steroids because it improves the appearance of the muscle against the skin – don’t ask me how. there is exactly zero evidence it does anything to make more muscle or to make the muscle stronger or to increase any other thing that would help a person who is already good enough to be a ML baseball player a better baseball player. the rumor that it improves the eyesight of a ballplayer whose eyesight is already 20/10 is invented by people who were trying to find SOME explanation of why barry lamar bonds’ pitch recognition was, to put it mildly – extraordinary. the fact that it ALWAYS was is ignored, as it destroys the myth.

      HGH is banned, really, because it is associated with steroid use – not because it actually DOES anything. sort of like some chemicals like pregnenolone (produced by a pregnant woman’s placenta) are banned, not because guys are trying to get pregnant, or think the stuff makes them “glow” but because it is actually a “steroid” – even though its only anabolic effect is on a uterus, which, far as i know, MLB players don’t got.

      sometimes, these things go too far – like with the flower oil or asthma medicine – and that maroon gary wadler is now trying to get coffee banned.

      but i think that people really think that if any old person shoots up testosterone, it will turn him from some nobody A-ball guy into Barry Lamar Bonds. really silly.

      i think that the most likely truth is that steroid-like substances, if used properly, could possibly help a ML player heal injuries faster and probably help maintain strength throughout the grueling year. the insistance that mcgwire couldn’t have played in the majors EVER if he didn’t shoot up is preposterous.

      the other thing i wonder about steroids is if it’s most important affect is to increase confidence. you guys don’t talk about confidence as if it is crucial to baseball success for no reason at all.

      and that players are/were most helped by stimulants – not because major leaguers are always drunk/hungover like Mickey, Whitey and Da Babe, but because it is very LONG and tiring season and even the cleanest of squeaky clean livin guys who never goes out gets tired out by all the traveling and the long days. and staying awake and focusing is a lot more critical than a lot of people want to believe – mostly because it doesn’t have anything to do with the size of the ballplayer. and it is interesting, by the way, to note that the theraputic use exemptions for amphetamines – diagnosis of ADD – is over 10% of ballplayers these days.

      like the old song goes – things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

      i also understand that the rules change over time and what is “cheating” now was NOT cheating “then” – and i mean everything from spitballs, grabbing runners by their belts, to supplements and illegal drugs ranging from DMSO to roids to greenies who knows what.

      and the problem with “cheaters” and “milestones” is that it isn’t simple. i mean, it’s not like you had people running barefoot on a dirt track unchanged in any way for a hundred years and comparing times from different years. theres just too many factors to change – especially the fact that the milestoners were competing against at least SOME “cheaters” and we don’t know who they were, how many there were, or if the “cheating” had any real effect on the baseball performance.

    8. gayle says:

      Morgan I would like to know your thoughts on what the impact of the ban of greenies has done to the game in some respects more so than steroids. I am one who believes that greenies were much more rampant than steroids and the banning of them has effected players and in a larger respect veteran older players. As an example the Yankees are comin off a string of 20 games in a row many day games after night games etc often they just look tired and slow during these types of strings and the same goes with other teams.

    9. Cesar says:

      I am thinking about taking prohormones, do
      you think this is good idea for advanced bodybuilder like me?

      Bodybuilders are satisfied with the results after prohormones cycles, just google for – 100% pure muscles without side effects – worth a try?

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